From Pupul Jayakar Biography of JK

 Page 10 : He to her , circa 1948 . 

" Have you ever been alone ? Without books ? The radio ? Try and see what happens ! " 

" For mind to be creative there must be deep stillness . That can only come into being when you have faced your loneliness . " 

" If you love, then you do not demand . Then, if the person does not love you , you will help other to love, even though it is someone else ! " 

Page 12 , end of the chapter : " As I journeyed back home, I suddenly realized that, in many face to face conversations, JK did not say a single word about himself . There has been no reference to any personal experience, not a single movement of self has manifested itself . It was this that made him a stranger , however well you knew him ! In the midst of a gesture of friendship, a casual conversation , one felt it - a sudden distance, silences that emanated from him, a consciousness that had no focal point . And yet, in his presence, one felt the bounty of an infinite concern ! " 

Page 48  

17 Aug 1922 . His first Kundalini experience, started with a server pain in the neck . 

" I had the most extraordinary experience . There was a man mending the road and that man was me ! The very stone which he was breaking was a part of me . The tender blade of grass was my very being and the tree beside the man was myself . I almost could feel and think like the roadmender, and I could feel the wind passing through the tree and the little ant on the blad of grass I could feel. 

The birds , the dust and the very noise were a part of me ! Just then, there was a car passing by and some at some distance. I was the driver, I was the engine and the t . As the car went further away from me, I was going away from myself . I was in everything , or, rather, everything was in me, inanimate and the animate,   the mountain, the work and the all breathing things . All day long I remained in this h happy condition . I cold not eat anything ! And again, at about six, I began to lose my physical body , and naturally, the physical elemental did what it liked ; I was semi conscious! 

1922  , 18 August  Page 48 

I felt an acute pain and I had to cut down my meditation to 15 minutes . Pain grew worse and by 19 Aug , friends took me to bed . 

In front of me was my body and over my head I saw the star bright and clear . Then, I could feel the vibration of Lord Buddha . I beheld Lord Buddha and master KH ( Koot Hoomi ) and I was so happy, calm and at peace . I could still see my body and I was hovering and within myself was the calmness of the  bottom of a deep unfathomable lake . Like the lake, I felt the physical body , an unfathomable lake . Like th lake I felt that my physical body with its mind and emotions could be ruffled on the surface, but nothing, may nay nothing could disturb the calmness of my soul . The presence of the might Beings was with me for sometime and then, They were gone ! I was supremely happy for I had seen . Nothing could ever be the same . I have drunk at the clear pure waters at the source of the fountain of life and my soul was appease . Never more could I be thirsty , never more could i be in utter darkness. I have seen the Light . I have touched compassion which heals all sorrows and suffering , it's not for myself, but for the world . I have stood on the mountain top and gazed at the mighty Beings. Never can I be in utter darkness ; I have seen glorious and healing  light . The fountain Truth has been revealed to me and the darkness has been dispersed . Love in its all glory has intoxicated my heart ; my heart can never be closed . I have a drunk at the fountain of joy and eternal Beauty . I am God intoxicated .  ( page 49) 

Page 65 

Krishnaji spoke of the Lord Buddha and that state of existence which is absolutely without self . He is thinking much of being absolutely impersonal these days , and already he seems to have dived dep into that clear well which is unsullied by the mud of self . As he spoke of Lord Buddha  , a new world lay stretched before one, in which all personal love and ambition died away and became as naught, only impersonal , tremendous unshakeable love remained . The full realisation of life without self only came to Krishnaji while he was at Ojai , and even he finds it almost impossible to describe .  

Page 72 

 " In the message to the International Self Preparation group, shortley after Nitya's death, Krishna jee wrote " For instance , when my brother died, I felt utterly lost ! You have no idea how I felt for 2 or 3 days ! For more than that, for a week, perhaps. I still miss him . I shall always miss him, physically . But I feel that, he and I are working, together , that we are walking along the same path, on the same mountain side, seeing the same flowers, the same creatures, the same blue sky, the same clouds and tress. That is why, I feel as if I were a part of him and the only when I get tired , djo I begin to say ' My brother is not here ' . But at once my mind pulls me up an tells me how absurd is such a thought. "